First Time Momma

Being a mom in 2017 is difficult, and no I don’t mean how we moms have to wake up each morning slightly brush our hair and attempt to find the chance to brush our teeth. I mean it seems that everywhere you turn people are judging you for every little thing you do. Now a days there are too many women feeling ridiculed and criticized by each other rather than being supported and uplifted. Isn’t it obvious that us women need to stick together as a whole? I realized this in March 2017 when my entire life changed. This was the day I gave birth to the most amazing little girl. Upon finishing an exhausting delivery I took one look at my daughter and knew my life was now entirely about her. While it took me awhile to learn the ins and outs I quickly became a great mom. Getting to this point wasn’t that easy though.

Discovering I was pregnant wasn’t as exciting as I had hoped it would be. Emotions of fear, embarrassment, doubt and confusion flooded through my body. Not only wasn’t I married but it wasn’t in my five year plan, in fact I wasn’t even sure it was in my ten year plan! How was I going to tell everyone? My boyfriend of six years travelled for work so I called him first. He was calm and so excited. Me, I was not. It felt horrible to not be excited. So many cannot have children, and so many try religiously to get pregnant and here I was, pregnant and not excited. How could I be so selfish? It took 3 months for the embarrassment and shame to go away and now I look back and am so glad I went through these emotions. Why? It brought me closer with my family and friends. People were there for me, it allowed for me to see that this little angel was going to be surrounded with love when she was born. When the excitement hit it was almost impossible to get away from. Don’t get me wrong I was still extremely nervous and questioning every little thing but the excitement began to take over these feelings. Decorating the nursery, shopping for the little shoes and headbands, the adorable diaper bags and my god the outfits. Seriously could it get any better?

Then she was born and my questions disappeared. How could I have ever thought I was going to be a bad mom? How could I ever have not been excited? The little fingers and toes, how she relied on me to comfort her, it was the most marvellous feeling I have ever felt. Nothing else mattered but her well being. My partner and I grew as a whole ten times that day along with the size of our hearts, ok and maybe the bags under our eyes as well. Our family was now perfect. However, upon leaving the hospital the difficulties arose, people judging for how she was dressed, the headbands on her head and my god even how I carried her baby carrier. It got to the point where I began questioning everything. Calling my mom and friends to ensure I was doing things right. I mean I thought I was, I was breastfeeding, checking on her through the night, checking her breathing rhythms, bathing her daily and making sure we made all her appointments but yet I still felt other moms were looking at me funny. I even had one lady tell me that it was dangerous to carry her around in a carseat carrier. I mean seriously?! I couldn’t figure it out!

Thats when I realized it, other moms ARE looking at me funny.. but it’s not me, its them! Everyone has a different opinion, some like to breastfeed while others like to formula feed. Some like to dress their babes up to go out others leave them in their jammies. Some buy expensive carseats others don’t. The thing is nothing is wrong or bad. Us moms, young and old, have to stick together and understand we are all just doing the best we can. We shouldn’t be commenting or criticizing on other moms parenting styles because we all know our own babies best and we all do what is best for them! Maybe breastfeeding is right for me and formula for you. Maybe co-sleeping is right for you and not for me. Oh and to those that said I’m young to have a baby, you are right.. I am young at twenty-four years old! BUT I have my S**T together! And really, there isn’t a better time for me to have a baby having graduated, owning a home and having a partner that I will spend the rest of my life with. So hey moms!! Young & old, instead of judging the next mom you see congratulate her on being a BADASS MOM! You don’t know what she has been through or what she is going through BUT you do know that all us mommas have a huge amount of love for our babes.

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